My New Normal

The alarm went off and I got out of bed to head for the shower. I was on the floor immediately as my legs turned into wet noodles, my bedroom was spinning.

I was used to working all day, coming home, changing clothes and then going to my friends' house to help with dinner and the kids' homework. Now, I was exhausted even if I slept 14 hours and I could not go anywhere after work.

I had 20/20 vision until the day I had spots in my left eye and blurry vision. The diagnosis was Multiple Sclerosis.

The past 12 years since the diagnosis have been filled with a new normal. I had to work three times as hard for a supervisor who would call me into her office at least once a month to tell me that I was worthless and lucky to have a job. I was told I could be fired at any time because I kept missing work due to multiple admissions into the hospital. I have stayed awake all hours of the night worried about being single, and sole support paying monthly "normal" bills plus monthly medical bills. I have had people rebuke me for all sorts of things ("I know that your neurologist said that you can work for 30 more years but why won't you just stop working and go on disability? Just pretend you can't work." or "Sherri you have unconfessed sin... that is why you got the disease.")

There are miracles that I have seen in my life. Many people in my life have witnessed them as well. When I needed treatment over the past few years, NO money to pay, God stepped in through His people. Specialists who are not even Christians have discounted or waived fees at times. God has given doctors wisdom to treat the disease. Wisdom that they didn't even know that they had.

As you read this you may be worried about something, or have something on your heart you need God to work out. God cares about everything that concerns you. He will supply, provide, comfort, and do what is best concerning you. He wants to hear from you. He loves you so much. What keeps me grounded and full of hope is reading my Bible, praying, singing, and worshipping. I don't see my new normal changing or going away, but I do see His hand, power, and provision.

God's intention is to love and strengthen you every day. That doesn't mean that every day will be a Broadway musical with sunshine when you open your front door. However, my own experience is that even when all you can say is, "God, please help me" He has your back.

Intentionally get closer to Him.

Sherri